Overcoming Fear with Belief

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Fear is probably the single biggest cause for failure in our lives.  It is most often accompanied by worry and doubt.  When these are present in our lives we cripple our ability to excel and thrive.  We create our own obstacles and stop our progression.  Fear will usually cause a fight or flight reaction.  More often than not, the majority of people will fly.  They run and hide from the fear instead of fighting it.  While hiding from our fear, we begin to doubt ourselves and worry about the future.  Instead of taking control of our future, we cripple it.

I understand that many of us have some real fears in our lives, these can be more challenging and difficult to overcome.  We also each maintain many fears that are not only self created, but unfounded.  We may fear for a family member and their  struggles, or a fear of losing a job that we already have.  This creates many times a self fulfilling prophecy, we fear we will lose our job, the worry and doubt in our abilities that accompanies the fear impact our abilities and performance in our job and we then create our own dismissal from our employment as a result.  We bring to pass our own fears into reality.  We may fear getting ill and the worry and doubt that accompanies it as we hyper focus on it in turn truly makes us sick, again we fulfill our own fears.  These are just a couple of examples that lead to the fulfillment of our own self imposed fears.

Conversely, hope and belief can create an opposite effect.  As we hope for a better life and believe that we deserve one, when our actions align with those beliefs we will open doors for ourselves that will lead to our own success.  The old adage, if we can dream it, we can achieve it,..  this is true yet belief must accompany the dream for us to achieve those dreams.  I have many acquaintances whom believe that they do not deserve anything better than what they have achieved or been given.  This becomes true for them as they never move beyond what they have.

I remember as a young man starting out in my career for a whopping $4.75 per hour.  I was happy because it was not the grocery store where I had been working prior for a mere $3.25 an hour.  I had taken a step forward and I knew in my heart and believed unequivocally in myself that I would excel in this career and do very well for myself.  I exceeded the expectations of everyone around me and created through hard work and my self belief tremendous success in my career.  My success in my career became an anchor in my life and a road map in overcoming obstacles and challenges.   Each time fear would show its ugly head I would fight it, face it and conquer it.  I never allowed the doubt to accompany the fear and each time worry would enter my mind, I eliminated as soon as I was able to clearly identify why I was worried. 

We can can achieve anything we want in this life with hard work and belief in ones self.  In order to do so we must eliminate fear, doubt and worry from our lives.  The future is ours to design and create.  What we choose to bring with us will determine the level of success and happiness we achieve.

FINDING JOY IN THE JOURNEY

Family - Beach

Finding joy in our journey here on earth at times can seem daunting as life’s challenges and obstacles can create sometimes seemingly overwhelming sadness, sorrow and depression. Overcoming this cycle many of us find ourselves in at one point or another in this life is key to finding that lasting joy we all seek.  It is upon learning, understanding, believing and then acting upon the belief, that we are in control of our own happiness and joy, that we can finally take control of our own lives. We can discover the true joy that exists and that we alone control.  Perspective, gratitude and focus are some of the most powerful tools we have at our own personal disposal to change our own lives and find Joy in the journey.  We alone control these tools, ones that can be used to change or destroy our lives.  The choice is ours and ours alone, no one else can control that choice but ourselves.

Perspective and how we view ourselves, others around us, the circumstances we find ourselves in and the world around is critical to the level of happiness and joy we can attain in this life.  By shifting our perspective towards a more positive outlook and looking at things from a broader view of the world we can eliminate much of our self doubt we encounter along the way.  We will discover as we look through different lenses that the most difficult of life’s events can be overcome and that these moments can make us stronger. We will gain wisdom, understanding and clarity as we widen our view with which we see things.  It’s all a matter of perspective.

Gratitude provides us the opportunity in our lives to see the blessings we are given each day.  As we identify and write down the things we are grateful for our hearts and minds will be opened to seeing the positive in our lives.   It may be as simple as a shirt on our backs, a dry place to sleep, to our children and families.  Sincere gratitude for what we have in our lives and the blessings we are given, opens our hearts to recognizing that happiness does not come from no problems in our lives, it comes from our abilities to handle the problems we are given.  Epicurus said it best “Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” Be grateful in all things.

Focus is a fundamental key to finding joy in our lives,  The law of attraction is immensely powerful, we attract into our lives that which we focus upon. Finding a clear perspective in everything allows us to master this law of attraction and bring these things into our lives we all desire, for “man is that he might have joy.”  The things that we focus upon in life are the things we attract in our life.  If we spend our time and effort focusing upon the negative things that happen to us, our circumstances, or what we deem “unfair” we will attract more the those negative situations into our lives.  An individual who is sick and spends their time focused on the sickness, always seems to get more sick.  Individuals who focus on others, and service to others, are always surrounded by great friends while those that focus inward and their loneliness, find themselves more lonely.  A positive focus in life will bring about positive effects in our lives.  We master that where we spend our time and energy (focus).

Our lives are meant to be filled with happiness, joy and love.    We alone control our success or failure in these areas.  We are the captain of our own ship, the choices we make with our perspectives, gratitude and focus will determine the level of success in life we find.

“At the end of the day, let there be no excuses, no explanations, no regrets.”  Steve Maraboli

THE POWER OF CHOICE

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Have you ever noticed that some people regardless of the trials they are facing in life always seem to be happy and always in a good mood?  There are many who have learned that they have a power within them to be happy, no matter what they are facing in life.   They make a choice.

Choices are the most powerful force we have in our lives and ones we alone have total ownership of.  It is through our choices that our lives are lived, our paths are chosen and our circumstances are brought to pass.  Understanding this powerful force in our lives allows us to create the future we desire and deserve.

There are many of us who all too often blame others for our own bad choices and the difficult circumstances we find ourselves in.  While it is true that many of the challenges we face are created by the choices of others, the responsibility for our choices overrides anything that another can do.  I used to blame my sadness and unhappiness on my ex and her choices that led to the demise of our family, until I learned that in the beginning it was MY CHOICE to date her and marry her.  I invited her into my life and in that single act and choice of my own, I allowed the situation that then led to my sadness and unhappiness.  The feelings I felt and the sorrow that I felt were also MY CHOICE to accept them into my life. When I began choosing to take responsibility for my own choices, both the good and bad choices that I alone had made, I discovered a power within me to take control of my own life and stop letting others choices dictate my satisfaction and success in life.

This isn’t to say that I don’t struggle with the outcome and result from choices that others have made that have impacted my life directly, it does mean that I take responsibility for my choices in how it impacts me. I miss my children immensely, the choices of their mother impact my life on a daily basis.  At times the sorrow at not seeing them seems overwhelming.  When I feel the deep sense of loss and imminent despair, I remind myself of the simple rule that has taken me a lifetime to learn, I choose my own feelings.  I choose to be happy for my kids sake.  If I am despondent then what good am I to them?  The more I understand the power in choices, the more I refuse to allow anyone else to choose my happiness or sadness for me.  It is my life and I alone am in control.

There are some who will argue that we don’t choose our circumstances in life.  While on many levels this would be true, this isn’t about choosing what we have been born into, or sickness and disease, it is all about choosing what we are to become and who we are!  Regardless of our own personal struggles, we alone choose how we respond to them.  There is no one else who can make those choices for us. If we choose to break the law that takes us into a prison where we lose our freedoms, the original choice was ours and ours alone.  There are always consequences for our choices.  Choose wisely and we gain success in our endeavors, choose poorly and we create additional obstacles that limit what choices we are able to make.  Our attitude will always be our choice alone!

Sometimes we feel like we have no other choice, that circumstances require the choice we make.  Logically, this may be true, that the wisest choice is obvious and set before us, however the choice to act or not to act upon that logic is ours and ours alone. Every day of our lives are filled with choices, sometimes we even make the choice not to make a choice, regardless we have chosen inaction over action and we are responsible for that choice, or lack thereof.

Choices are one of the most powerful forces upon us in our lives.  It is through our understanding and mastering of this limitless personal power that will create the life we envision for ourselves.  When we take responsibility for our choices, both past and present we can take tremendous power over our lives and responsibility for ourselves.  We are in control of our choices and therefore over our own destiny and futures.   Our lives are a mirror image of the personal choices we make, what we see in the mirror staring back at us come from all the choices that we have made.  If we don’t like what we see, change how make your choices.