The Unintended Consequence of Choice

unintended-consequences

We have become a society where we are so quick to make decisions while at the same time failing to assess each situation that we fail to look at the unintended consequences of those decisions.

We complain when those decisions then go rogue and we are left wondering what happened.  We see this in every aspect of our culture, from politics to personal hygiene to education, etc..

Oftentimes we choose the easy and quick way out or the rash decision to do something that will impact our future.  We then blame others when these choices we make come back with the unintended consequences that we then must face.

We see this playing out in a big way in our senate right now.  When Harry Reid made the choice to amend the senate rules many cheered his decision.   Now when these same rules are being used on the other side, people are railing against the methods which the republicans are moving things forward.  The unintended consequences of a choice made years ago have now come full circle.   If you supported that decision then by Harry Reid, you have no room to complain today when the opposition uses that same rule.

We are quick to use student loans freely when we have no payments and the balances rise, we believe that it will never catch up to us, then when we are straddled with the extreme debt that prohibits us from buying a house, a car or any other thing else, we blame the system instead of looking at the unintended consequences of our prior choices.

When someone decides to engage in unprotected sex we complain about the pregnancy and race to get an abortion refusing to face our unintended consequences of sexual behavior.

We as a society have gotten to the point of blaming everyone else for the unintended consequences of our own personal choices.  We fail to properly assess any choice we make and then try to force others to take the responsibility for unintended consequences of our choices.

There is no personal responsibility left.  We have abdicated that to others and as such we have traded our freedom of choice for the pleasure of the moment.

 

 

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Hiding Behind Smiles

fake-smiles

Do you know what is hiding behind this smile that you see?

Do you know of the pain that I keep just to me?

The world sees me laugh and smiling each day

No one knows of my hidden anguish inside that’s at play

For the smile is a barrier to keep people out

It hides from the world all my pain and self doubt

So when someone you know is smiling at you

Remember their hidden pains are not getting through

For we all in this word carry heartache inside

And our heartaches and pains from the world we hide

The scars for most are hidden deep within

Understanding their pains, most can never begin

So be kind to all whom we meet everyday

For we know not their inside as their tender hearts pray

A kind word and gesture to a stranger today

Might be the answer for which they earnestly pray

 

 

To the “Not My President” Fools

not_my_president

“Not my President”

I seems that this particular phrase recycles every election cycle.   We saw it make the rounds on social media during both terms of President Obama and now with President Trump.

It’s ironic that the two opposing sides cannot find common ground to resolve issues, yet use the exact same words and phrase when they don’t get their way.  It’s like the spoiled little kid on the playground who stomps off when others choose a game that they didn’t.

Now you might wonder if I voted for President Trump.  The answer is NO I did not.  I worry about his temperament and do not support the vile divisive rhetoric of his campaign.

Yet, I did NOT vote for President Obama either.   I was deeply opposed to his policies and his agenda.

Yet, BOTH of these men were and are my President.

YES I vote!  I have never missed an opportunity to exercise my sacred God given right to vote, I take this very seriously and have voted in every election since 1988, the first time I could cast my vote.

You see, I have not given up my citizenship nor have I left this great land.  I take pride in who we are as a nation, I believe that we can heal and become better, and YES President Trump is my president because I am first an American citizen.   My political beliefs do not override this nor will they ever!

I laugh out loud with each new post on social media that claims “Not my President”  Did you abandon your citizenship?  Have you left the United States?  If so, then it really doesn’t matter, If not then you have abandoned your country.

Although I never voted for either President Obama or President Trump, I will NEVER claim that they are not my president for they are and were the President of the United States of America.  I may vehemently disagree with their agendas or policies, however I will never make such a foolish claim.  My love for America comes first and is far more powerful than my disdain for any leader.

If this is rhetoric that you stand by, imagine how foolish you really look.  I would bet that the very individuals that are now spewing this divisiveness and hatred on social media are the very ones that mocked the same fools when President Obama won the election, making you a hypocrite and a fool.

 

Your Son…..Is My Son’s BULLY

bully-cartoon

 

Your face is bright and beaming

As your son runs down the court

Your heart is pride fully beating

Your son is the star in every sport

The crowd chants him on to victory

They cheer him on and on

Your son he’s so magnificent

For in your eyes he does no wrong

Your son, he is no hero

When I see him it makes me sick

He is the Junior high school bully

He is nothing but a prick

Your son is MY SON”S bully

Terrorizing him each day

YOUR SON is MY SON’s bully

He is evil in every way

My son his grades now struggle

His personality has changed

My son now suffers from depression

Another trophy which your son has claimed

So cheer your son to victory

and think he is so cool

When in reality your sons a bully

And he’s made you such a fool

Your son and his bullying behavior

It happens EVERY DAY!

Now for my son’s life I am praying

For each and every day!

 

The collision of “when” and “If Only”

if-only

 

“If Only”  I could make just enough money to pay my rent I would be happy”

“If only” I could make $20.00 per hour I would be so happy”

“If only my wife would listen to me more and stop nagging”

If only……. How many times have we found ourselves asking this question in life?

One of the greatest lessons that I have ever learned in my life was to lose the desperation in my life and believe in myself, believe that I was worth more than the “If Only”

If only places self imposed limits upon ourselves, it sets the bar at the lowest we could possibly place it  in any aspect of our lives.

I remember building my first company, I would continually tell myself if I could only land one new client a week then I could really get this going… If only I could land one good client, business would get better.   I was seemingly desperate to have that “only if” happen.

As fate would have it, I received EXACTLY what I was asking for.  I began receiving the only if, which was the lowest bar I could set for myself.   Sales struggled, clients sensed the desperation that “only if” created.   Opportunity was being squandered.

Then one day it struck me like a lightning bolt.  If I believed that I was truly worth more than any only if could ever give me, then I should start acting and believing that I was more.

I stopped using only if in my life.   I started setting goals that made me believe that I was worth more.   As I hit one goal , I would raise that bar higher.  It was no longer only if, it was now “when”.

As I started to think in terms of “When” I achieve something instead of “only if” I could achieve something,  I became more powerful and in control of my own destiny.   No longer was I dependent upon what someone else thought of me, I was taking control and believing in the “when.”

“When” creates a certainty that something will happen while “only if” creates chance.  I started to take control that things will happen and took chance out of the equation.

“When” we believe in ourselves and our own abilities we create the opportunities we need to fundamentally change our lives, while thinking in terms of “only if” we create false dreams with no clear pathway to that success.

“When” is definitive and full of belief.  “Only if” is full of doubt and chance.

 

 

We are all Immigrants

pioneers_1011

 

Immigration has been a significant part of our conversations lately.   My wife being from Mexico City and many of our friends are immigrants, this issue seems to permeate much of our personal conversation much like that of the national media and social networks of late.

First off, let me make one thing clear, this is not about terrorism, as a nation we must do all we can do to keep those who want to harm us from entering our country.  The system is broken and MUST be fixed, however one simple solution like building a wall will not fix our immigration crisis.   Those who believe this is the magic bullet will be sadly mistaken.

I find it interesting to see the posts of my family,  friends and neighbors, and the wild opinions regarding immigration, comments like “I lock my doors to my house every night. I don’t lock them because I hate the people  outside my house, I lock them because I love the people inside my house.” fill social media posts.

Have you stopped to really think about what this is saying?   It saying that everyone who is outside our country wants to hurt us and so we must lock everyone out.  What a ridiculous sentiment.

The vast majority of those coming here come for one of two reasons, they are seeking refuge from persecution, most often that of religious or ethnic persecution, or they are searching for a better life.   Those who have never personally visited somewhere where extreme poverty exists can never truly comprehend how many people in this world are forced to live and under what conditions.  We do not have that kind of poverty here in the United States.

The other reason of fleeing persecution is one that strikes me in a much different way, I find it rather interesting that we as a nation were founded by those fleeing Europe for the very same reason, they came to this land and forced the native inhabitants into reservations to claim it as there own, all while claiming they were fleeing for religious freedoms.

My Great Great grandparents were forced from their homes and forced to leave the United States seeking the freedom to worship as they believed.   Governor Boggs of Missouri issued an extermination order for all Mormons.  My ancestors were tortured, terrorized, raped and assaulted simply for their religious beliefs.   They were US citizens being tortured and their constitutional rights denied simply based upon their faith.  They fled this country as immigrants to MEXICO seeking refuge from the persecution. Utah was part of Mexico when the Mormon pioneers fled seeking protection from the persecution.

While my own ancestors were forced to flee to Mexico seeking freedom from this, it pains me to witness my own family and friends who’s ancestors experienced the same so willing to jump on this bandwagon without taking a pause to reflect upon our past.

 

 

The Abuse of Power Pendulum

pendulum

 

Lately we have experienced a significant swing in the political spectrum.   We have gone from the hard left to the hard right.  The pendulum effect.

When the left was in control, the rabid followers of the democratic party cheered Obama on as he continually abused his power, cheering his executive orders and the power grab in the executive office.  Cheering abounded as the constitutional rights of those who thought differently were trampled upon.  The right wing cried foul and did everything in their power to reign in this usurped power grabbed by then President Obama.

Fast forward 8 years to the infancy of this new administration, the pendulum has swung far to the right and the same power grab is occurring, the extreme right cheers in a form a vindication for the past 8 years while the left comes unhinged for the same abuse of power they previously cheered under the Obama administration.

Abuse of power is exactly that, regardless whether you agree with the reason or not, it is still dangerous and divisive.  The hypocrisy in the United States has reached an all time high,  both the left and the right cheer on to victory when the abuse of office is in favor of their opinions and ideals yet come unhinged when that same abuse of power goes contrary to what they think or believe.

Cheering on any abuse of power will never lead to a better society for any of us.  We must stand against abuses of any sort, whether that abuse is something we think is a good idea or not, it must be done according to rule and order of law.  When we do not stand against abuses because we agree with it, we all lose as this pendulum will for certainty slam to the left again one day and those that are cheering the current abuses of power will undoubtedly be hysterical when that day happens.