Love for many is elusive. We find infatuation quickly and jump into relationships based upon infatuation while professing we have found true love. True love exists however few understand what this is.
Infatuation makes our hearts beat faster and our minds to go to mush as we get caught up in a whirlwind romance often driven by the flames of physical passion and desire. We crave the burning chemical rush from the flames of this passion and believe we have found our soulmates. We come from a space where our own needs and physical desires are met. These self serving emotions are just as quickly snuffed out and we are left wondering what went wrong. There is no foundation for infatuation, it is fleeting and built from nothing. Infatuation hits quickly and dies faster. We pick up the broken pieces left over from our crushed expectations and move on to the next adrenaline rush of emotions believing this time it will be different.
The world sees this as love. We hear continually that one can fall out of love. I argue this is impossible. One cannot fall out of love. We fall out of infatuation.
Love is different. When love is real it is service. It is kindness. It is compassion. It is not self serving and driven by the whims of change. It is not fleeting and it does not die. For when love is real, our desire is to serve others that we love, not for them to serve us.
YES we can love someone whom does not love us back. This is common and happens often. The greatest love stories are those that both parties have placed the others needs before there own. They serve one another.
There are many stories told of couples when one becomes ill and the other one steps up to serve them and care for them. It is clear that their bond and love they share grows during these difficult and trying times. Their love grows during this season of service and caring.
We often hear of a mothers love for her children. WHY? Because when the children are young they are fully dependent upon their mother. Their mother loves them and this love grows as they continue to serve them. Children learn to love their mothers as they in turn serve their mother as they grow. Children desire to please their parents and in so doing they serve them, this service develops love.
There are many that will argue that in just as many cases that one person serves while the other one takes. While this is true, look at the one that is always the one that is the most heartbroken when a relationship ends. It is ALWAYS the one that served and gave the most to the relationship.
True undying mutual love can only be attained when both parties make the other a priority and serve them without expecting anything in return. True love is service.
Anyone who goes to a foreign country to serve for any reason always comes back with a love for the people and culture in which they served.
If you are struggling in your relationships and wonder where the magic went, try genuinely serving each other and be amazed at where this will lead.