Childhood Memories – Rafting the Green River

jisbell22

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We spent many summer vacations traveling by camper around the west coast with our family, aunts, uncles and cousins.  These wonderful opportunities to be with our cousins have provided many of the great and amazing memories of my childhood.  My cousins and us were very close friends growing up, that closeness can still be felt today at those rare moments when we are all together.

One such memorable trip was to Flaming Gorge and river rafting the Green River.  River rafting can be such an exhilarating experience, especially for young children.  We would launch the raft below the Flaming Gorge Dam and ride the current, with its many rapids for seven miles, all the way to the first stop at little hole.  We would unload the raft, load it on top of the truck and do it again.

Oh wow us kids had fun!  We would fish along the banks…

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Conquering the Abuse, A Fathers Legacy!

jisbell22

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You fought and fought forever

as a child torn apart

the life that you were given

was so difficult at the start

you overcame the challenge

and the obstacles in your way

you conquered the abuser

and those who hurt you everyday

you swallowed all the poison

and hid the pain within

you created your own family

and showed us how to win

so thank you for the lessons

and the legacy left behind

you broke the abusers cycle

so the light upon us shines

now your children and their children

have a life to call their own

for none of us will suffer

the pain that you have known

the gift that you have given

to those you leave behind

a gift of live and happiness

you’ve left for us to find

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FINDING JOY IN THE JOURNEY

Some days I need a little reminding

jisbell22

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Finding joy in our journey here on earth at times can seem daunting as life’s challenges and obstacles can create sometimes seemingly overwhelming sadness, sorrow and depression. Overcoming this cycle many of us find ourselves in at one point or another in this life is key to finding that lasting joy we all seek.  It is upon learning, understanding, believing and then acting upon the belief, that we are in control of our own happiness and joy, that we can finally take control of our own lives. We can discover the true joy that exists and that we alone control.  Perspective, gratitude and focus are some of the most powerful tools we have at our own personal disposal to change our own lives and find Joy in the journey.  We alone control these tools, ones that can be used to change or destroy our lives.  The choice is ours and…

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The Games She Plays – A Fathers Heartache 19

I really hate being made out to be the bad guy with my children.   The stupid games of planning a family trip on my Fathers Day weekend and getting the kids all excited about it is a joke!  AFTER she plans the trip she then tries to “work” out a solution or a trade in weekends so that the kids can go with them.  Here’s a solution!  plan the trip on any of the 20 days a month you don’t let me see them! Who in their right mind does this crap to their children?

Now that she has done that, I am left holding the bag for this crap!  If I say no, the game starts that “your dad won’t let you come on this family trip!”  “If he loved you and really cared for you then that he wouldn’t take this away from you”

Why is it that I am able to plan ALL of my family time and trips around the extremely limited time that I get to see them and she pulls this crap on MY fathers day weekend?

Nine long years of these stupid games on my children.  Will she ever learn that she is destroying our children before it’s too late?

I can only pray for a miracle that my dear children survive her bullshit.